It's My LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, July 30, 2006

All Right!!! Reli Been Ages Since I Blogged XD Well Today While Tracting, I Was Talking To Canida Abt Jokes, And I Forgot Most Of Them, So Here We Are... A Post Abt Jokes ><" Juz Hope Anyone Who Still Frequents Mi Blog Checks This Out XD Haha... Oh Ya Anyways, This Is From A Book XD

Two Frens, Dave And John Are Talking Abt Their Love Life.
Dave:"So, John, How's It Going With The Ladies?"
John:"All Women Are Nothing But Sex Objects."
Dave:"Really?"
John:"Yep. Whenever I mention Sex, They Object!!"

To Impress His Date, The Young Man Took Her To A Very Chic Italian Restaurant. After Sipping Some Fine Wine, He Picked Up The Menu And Ordered.
"We'll Have The Giuseppe Spomdalucci," He Said.
"Sorry Sir," Said The Waiter. "That's The Owner!"

Desperate BF:"Sir, Your Daughter Says She Loves Me, And She Can't Live Without Me, And She Wants To Marry Me."
Parent:"And You're Asking My Permission To Marry Her?"
Desperate BF:"No, I'm Asking You To Make Her Leave Me Alone!"

A Funeral Service Is Being Held In A Synagogue For A Woman Who Just Passed Away. At The End Of The Service, The Pallbearers Are Carrying The Casket Out, When They Accidentally Bump Into A Wall, Jarring The Casket. They Hear A Faint Moan. They Open The Casket And Find That The Woman Is Alive. In Fact, She Lives For Ten More Years!!! Alas, She Finally Dies And The Funeral Is Again Held At The Same Synagogue. At The End Of The Ceremony, The Pallbearers Are Carrying Out The Casket. As They Are Walking Down The Aisle, The Husband Cries Out... "Watch Out For The Wall!!!"

Smith Goes To See His Supervisor In The Front Office.
"Boss," He Says, "We're Doing Some Heavy House-Cleaning At Home Tomorrow, And My Wife Needs Me To Help With The Attic And The Garage, Moving And Hauling Stuff."
"We're Short-Handed, Smith," The Boss Replies. "I Can't Give You The Day Off."
"Thanks, Boss," Says Smith, " I Knew I Could Count On You!"

An Elderly Couple, Georgia And Fred, Sit Down To Their Thanksgiving Dinner.
Before Eating His Wife Remarks, "Has Our 50 Years Of Marriage Made You Grateful?"
"Yes, Indeed!" Fred Replied. "I Was Grateful For The Twenty Years I Was A Bachelor!"

This Couple Had No hildren. Their Neighbour Had Seven Children. The Husband Went To The Neighbour For Guidance.
"This Saturday," Suggested His Neighbour, " Take Her Out To Her Favourite Restaurant, Order A Bottle Of The Best Wine, And Dine In Candle Light. After Dinner Bring Her Home And Open A Bottle Of The Best Champagne. Take Off All Her Clothes And Make Her Lie Down In Bed."
"Then?" Asked The Husband.
"Then Just Call Me!!" Said The Neighbour.

A Guy Was Kneeling Down By The Grave, Crying His Heart Out. "Oh Why Did You Have To Die? Why Did You Have To Die?"
A Passer-By, Touched By The Scene, Placed An Arm On His Shoulders, "Come, Come I Know How You Feel, Was This Your Father? Or Your Mother?"
"No, No," Cried The Man Again, "Oh, Why Did You Have To Die..."
"Was This Your Wife?" Asked The Passer-By Again.
"No, No, Oh Why Did He Have To Die..."
"Oh Pu-Lease, Tell Me Who It Is."
"He Was My Wife's First Husband," Groaned The Guy.

Last Joke!!!

A Guy, In His Office, Was Boasting To His Friend How Much He Loved His Wife.
A Friend Asked Him, "What Is The Colour Of Her Eyes?"The Guy Was Speechless. He Didn't Know. Immediately, He Went Home And Entered The Bedroom. The Wife Was Lying On The Bed With Her Eyes Open.
He Looked At Her Eyes And Said, "Ah, Brown."
Hearing This, Mr Brown Came Out From Under The Bed And Said, "How In The World Did You Know I Was Here??"

Ok, Thats All Folks! I'm Off To Dinner~ Sorry If The Jokes Are A Little Pervy ><" Ciao!

Signing Off,
Zilin, Not Ziling, Nor Zhilin

- 4:30 AM -